The media got it all wrong about Prince Harry’s memoir – here’s the real truth about ‘Spare’

For a word that has been widely used by the royal family and the British media to describe Prince Harry since his birth 38 years ago, it is ironic that the same two groups were most outraged by the Duke of Sussex’s decision to replace his forthcoming memoir SPARE.

“Royal sources” (aka anonymous palace assistants), media pundits and newspapers wasted no time in sharing their breathless outrage after publisher Penguin Random House revealed the tome’s title, steely cover and January 10 publication date. “Vicious,” “cruel,” “playing the victim again,” and, surprise, “everything Meghan does,” were just some of the angry reactions.

Of course, it shouldn’t come as a huge surprise to name the book SPARE – a decision Prince Harry made early in the process. It’s a powerful choice, but for a word that has haunted the prince like a shadow, being a surrogate has been one of the most defining aspects of his royal existence. Leaning on the derogatory nickname for a title is Harry, finally owning the term after being called that for a lifetime.

For the family business, Harry’s position as surrogate heir meant that he assumed the obligatory role of royal supporter from an early age. With no really defined job, The Firm needed one thing from him above all: to support his more important older brother, Prince William. It is a bizarre and somewhat cruel existence – the result of a system built on hereditary privilege. And in many cases it is also a curse. Princess Margaret’s life as Queen’s Deputy was riddled with drug abuse and alcoholism, and Prince Andrew’s life…well, the less talked about it the better.

A surrogate also carries a purpose rarely acknowledged by any royal or palace official – the resident scapegoat to protect the crown and higher-ranking family members. Collateral damage when blame or distraction is required. For those who have followed royal beat closely enough, the random timing of certain revelations or stories about Harry has already highlighted this. It will be interesting to see how SPARE – which does not shy away from this specific strain – describes these moments.

The story goes on

So far, only the smallest official details of the book’s 416 pages have been released by the publisher. They describe SPARE as a title written with “raw, unflinching honesty,” a book filled with “insight, revelation, introspection, and hard-won wisdom.” I would have expected nothing less from prolific ghostwriter JR Moehringer, famous for encouraging his subjects to turn on the lights during the darkest parts of their history.

Among those who have already seen the book’s manuscript, Harry’s surrogate journey and difficult decision to change his fortunes and start a new life elsewhere serve as significant parts of the book. Filled with the prince’s unmistakable cheekiness, this memoir also tells a surprisingly relatable life story. Sure, its opulent royal setting is far beyond any world any of us will ever know, but the themes covered in SPARE should resonate with readers of all backgrounds.

Dealing with grief and the tragic loss of a parent, struggling to accept yourself, sibling rivalry and falling in love with a person your family doesn’t accept are all part of the Duke’s very human story.

Although overlooked in the coverage, SPARE dedicates its largest sections to other key elements in the Duke’s life. Readers will hear moving anecdotes from the frontlines of Afghanistan and his time in the military, as well as honest insights into Harry’s search for meaning and why he chose to devote himself to lifelong service. A spokesperson for the book, which will be released a month after the release of the Sussexes’ forthcoming Netflix docuseries, adds that the intimate memoir will also “share the joy he has found in being a husband and father.”

Despite all the tabloid reports of Harry allegedly “destroying” his family (spoiler alert: he doesn’t), the book actually offers a more sympathetic look at the realities of their near-impossible existence. There were also no last-minute rewrites or edits after the Queen’s death. The SPARE manuscript was completed nearly five months before the monarch’s death, a detail acknowledged in a note at the beginning of the book.

No matter how carefully Harry shares pieces of his story with others, there is still a very real risk of serious backlash from the institution and family. Palace assistants recently told me of the “genuine fear” among senior members that this book will do irreparable damage to reputation and relationships. But for Harry, SPARE’s greater intent seems to make the risk worth it. “I hope that by sharing my story — the ups and downs, the mistakes, the lessons learned — I can help show that no matter where we come from, we have more in common than we think,” he said .

Hundreds of journalists, myself included, have written versions and fragments of the Duke’s story over the years. It’s a story he, as a working member of the royal family, has long been unable to tell himself. Now, having carved out an independent life for himself outside the confines of the royal institution, Harry finally has a chance to correct often inaccurately reported records. The freedom of speech. And no matter how you might feel about the man, it’s hard not to agree that he should have a right to it.