‘People can change, I’m living proof’: Matthew Perry opens up on fame, addiction and his harrowing memories

With apologies to Chandler Bing, Matthew Perry’s new memoir could be even more shocking?

Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thingwhich was released last week details the Canadian actor’s many career highlights – he was making more than $1 million a week to star on NBC friendsalong with Bruce Willis for the box office hit The whole nine yards – and many, many lows. This includes the millions of dollars he has spent on rehab (15 stops total), the number of Vicodin pills he would take per day (55), and how long he has been in a coma after a near-death experience (two weeks ).

But as unabashed and raw as Perry’s book is, it’s also big-hearted, insightful, and hilarious — a kind of sitcom-twisted tour of one man’s personal hell. And it’s already made headlines, both for its copious amount of Canadiana (Perry, whose mother Suzanne was once press secretary for Pierre Trudeau, recounts how he once beat up a school-age Justin) and its faux pas (Perry already has a slice of it spent his press tour apologizing for writing, “Why do the original thinkers like River Phoenix and Heath Ledger die, but Keanu Reeves still walks among us?”).

As the book begins to climb the bestseller charts, Perry spoke to The Globe and Mail about fame, addiction and the status of his feud with the Trudeaus from his Los Angeles home.

Was there a moment that made you start writing? The book feels like it poured out of you, like you’ve waited years to tell your story.

I had to wait until my sobriety was strong enough that I felt like I wasn’t going to relapse. You can’t write that and then show up somewhere drunk. So I waited, and to be honest, one day I felt very anxious, and my [Alcoholics Anonymous] The sponsor said a good way to support this is to be creative. I opened the Notes app on my phone and typed away with two thumbs and got 130 pages down before switching to an iPad.

Sorry you wrote 130 pages in Notes app?

That’s correct. It’s pretty crazy.

I take it you didn’t hire a ghostwriter?

No, I did everything myself. and [my publishers] had no notes. They let me do what I wanted.

You write late in the book that after step 12 of AA you had 68 names of people you were angry with which you then wrote down. Is this book partly an attempt to reach those 68 people?

Partly, but that’s also a big excuse. Here’s a blanket apology to all the women I’ve dated. I blew it up with several wonderful women because I was afraid that they would find the flaws in me and end it themselves and I wouldn’t be able to tolerate that. But now I’m not scared. This is also the message I want to send out. That people can change. I am living proof.

Some of your ex-boyfriends are named, like Julia Roberts, and some are anonymous. When writing, how concerned were you that you might be dealing with a lot of chaotic post-release conversations?

Oh no, none because I haven’t followed any of them. I blamed myself for everything and made sure I did. The only person I’m following here is me.

Have you heard from Julia Roberts about the book?

I haven’t and I don’t expect it either.

You write that you were once “so lonely it hurt”. Was writing this book partly an attempt to alleviate that loneliness?

Writing this article fixed a lot of things that were broken in me – I just threw up all that information on the blank page. The hardest thing for me was reading it. I had to do that for the audio book version. I almost broke up while writing it, and then I had to read it and I was like, “Oh my god, what a terrible life this guy had.” And then I quickly realized, oh no, that’s me.

They have spent millions on rehab and write that it is a completely corrupt system. Do you see hope for the addicts who don’t have access to your resources?

I do, completely. You don’t have to be rich to be successful in this program. Sometimes my money actually hurt me because it allowed me to keep going. But in the recreation world there are good and bad places. I’ve come across places that want to keep you in there longer to spend money and places that are way too strict and try to wean you off drugs way too quickly. It’s about surrounding yourself with the right people who will put you in the right place. What also saved me the whole time is that I get scared and I raise my hand. I’m like, “Whoa whoa whoa, I’m scared I’m going to die,” so I call the right people and take the steps from there.

I am curious if you have read the book generation friends by Saul Austerlitz, who describes the show’s writers’ room with 16-hour days as both a party and a prison cell. Was it that intense for you?

But on the contrary. It was a wonderful, creative experience that saved my life. I had rules that I would never work drunk or high, but sometimes I was incredibly hung over on set, and it was the cast that sustained me. I felt like I was shortstop for, say, the Toronto Blue Jays. I had the greatest job in the world and I couldn’t screw it up. If you’re getting a million dollars a week, you can’t have that 17th drink.

I appreciate any Canadian references, although I have to ask about the aftermath of this Justin Trudeau incident.

That closed a while ago when I said I don’t want to fight anymore and noted he had an army available now.

you mention friends Showrunners David Crane and Marta Kauffman here a few times, but you also write that “no one wanted to play with the money machine” that friends was. During the series, did the two ever have a heart-to-heart conversation with you about your addiction?

They came up to me and talked, but it was such a secret that I lied and pretended everything was fine. It became clearer that something was wrong with me as I lost weight and when I hit 130 pounds I went into rehab and then everyone knew it. But they never finished the show, and I’m really grateful to them for how patient they were.

Have you ever worried that something might be activated there? They are one-sixth an integral part of this machine.

No no. I’ve always looked at it this way, this is my fight and if it stops then it has to be me to stop it. And I did that once. I shot a movie in Dallas and hit rock bottom and shot there friends at the same time. I closed both to go to rehab.

Professionally, where do you want to go next?

My biggest goal is to finish this screenplay that I’ve written. I had an A-list actress who almost said yes, and then I could have directed and learned a new profession. And there’s a lot of talk about making this book into a movie, which would be insane and amazing. I would play the later half of me. But now it’s a time for celebration. Last night I spoke to an auditorium filled with thousands, but it’s also gratifying when a person asks me if I can help them stop drinking, and I say yes and go after it. This is more important than every attempt friends. I hope people will talk about this when I die.

This interview has been abridged and edited

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